I'm sitting in a coffeeshop in a little historic downtown about fifteen minutes from my house. It's one of my favorite places to go when I need to dream, work, read, or get away. I always wonder what everyone is up to in coffeeshops as they sip on their tea and Americanos. There are so many stories to be told here, so many people from so many different places. Today I sit at a table, on a bench that's unfortunately not very comfortable; it keeps squeaking every time I move. But here I am with my vanilla latte, only a couple sips left in my glass.
I dream today my biggest dreams. As I sit here, I think about how much pressure I put on myself to be living out these dreams NOW. I want to shoot destination weddings SO bad, I want to travel the world, I want to move to Hawaii or California... My dreams are big and they're not dreams that happen overnight. But I think about how just like God gave us a choice to follow him, he gives us a choice on what to do with our lives. So often I think, "Oh but I don't know if this is what God wants. I should probably wait until everything falls perfectly in my lap and then I'll know it's meant to happen." I worry I'm going to make the "wrong choice" or do the "wrong thing." Over the last year I have thought about that a lot. I don't know if I'm correct in thinking this but I think that God wants us to follow our hearts. He wants us to live out the dreams we have. But he wants us to follow him in the process. God will make it clear whether he wants something or not and if he doesn't, he'll shut the door. If you're following him closely, you'll know when the door is open or closed. But God can use you wherever you are.
I fear that if I moved to California it would take me years to get my business going and that I'd have to work another job that wouldn't allow me the time to shoot. I worry I'd run out of money or waste money that I'd end up needing on something more important. I worry I wouldn't make friends or that I'd end up being unhappy. My worries about being happy actually keep me from being happy. I listened to an Invisibilia podcast the other day and they talked about fear, about a woman in this world who cannot fear. Yes, there are about 400 people in the world who cannot fear. Unfortunately she is more susceptible to danger BUT she lives her life the way I wish I could. She experiences more than the average person because her brain isn't telling her to stay away from things or not to do things.
We're born with fear but it's how you manage your fear that allows you to truly live -- or not live. I don't know what 2015 holds. I barely know what tomorrow holds. But I do know that nothing is impossible with God and God cares about my dreams. Does this mean I'm going to move to California or Hawaii tomorrow? No, unfortunately not. My life doesn't point that direction right now with my schedule for 2015. But does this mean I'm giving up on my dream to travel all year or move to California or Hawaii? No.
I think the moral of the story is that you should dream and if you can, act on those dreams! My biggest fear is that I'll be 30 years old looking back at now wishing I had done more while I was young. Your dreams are achievable and I challenge you to go after them. You might fail but at least if you do, you'll know that's just part of your story. "It always seems impossible until it's done." -Nelson Mandela